Swearing, Kicking the Dirt, and Myself

You should have seen your faces when I tasted my own shoelaces, I was...
stetched so thin, you could see through my skin, see where I end and where I begin,
see the parts of me that rarely see anything but the underside of my pale wrapping,
I am sorry that I spoke, so God help me, if I don't choke, you'll know
I'm slowly learning from my mistakes, I'm slowly learning from my hands shake
so much from such and such and acting tough and no one saying anything but
enough's enough, nothing but barbs and twists, and no lifting up,
no, I could have done better, I could have worn a sweater when it's cold weather,
but I don't.
I just slide, slide, slide, and feeling always inferior and pushed aside,
I hide, hide, hide, and smile because I heard that is what's right.

But every time, I...

Man, I don't even know.
I'm tired, but I'm happy,
mostly, but lately,
I feel like all I do is let people down,
down to the ground,
and I'm being ground down,
it really hurts to
have no self-worth,
and feel so much remorse
for every single word that springs forth.

And I am alone.